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Blagues / Jokes Avez vous entendu une joke drôle (ou platte) que vous aimeriez partager? Racontez ! Did you hear a funny joke lately that you wish to share with everyone else? Please post it here.

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Vieux 25/08/2003, 22h17   #1 (permalink)
Squid
 
Date d'inscription: avril 2003
Localisation: sorel
Messages: 82
Pouvoir de réputation: 0
Reputation: 10 backseatrider is on a distinguished road

Moto: GS 500
 
Par défaut The next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy

The next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy.

Rob is commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He
performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail
he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 in Ft Wayne,
IN, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.


Hi Sue, just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I
had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a
few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of
the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the
water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this:

We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of
equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful
temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.

Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with
no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is
take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch.
So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.
The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.

I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other
divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive.
I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.

When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.
__________________
Pull over baby, MY BUTT HURTS!!!!
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Vieux 25/08/2003, 22h19   #2 (permalink)
World champion
 
Date d'inscription: janvier 2003
Localisation: Trois-Riviéres
Messages: 546
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Reputation: 10 Dan_ZX9R is on a distinguished road

Moto: Kawasaki ZX9R 1999
 
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Vieux 25/08/2003, 22h48   #3 (permalink)
World champion
 
Avatar de CornolioII
 
Date d'inscription: janvier 2003
Localisation: Sainte-Julie
Messages: 1 034
Pouvoir de réputation: 8
Reputation: 43 CornolioII is on a distinguished road

Moto: machine à reculer dans le temps
 
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Vieux 25/08/2003, 23h39   #4 (permalink)
Moderateur
 
Avatar de chaosExpanding
 
Date d'inscription: janvier 2003
Localisation: St-Lambert
Messages: 5 289
Pouvoir de réputation: 13
Reputation: 348 chaosExpanding is a jewel in the roughchaosExpanding is a jewel in the roughchaosExpanding is a jewel in the roughchaosExpanding is a jewel in the rough

Moto: '90 Yamaha FZR400 full factory + Honda XR100
 
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Vieux 26/08/2003, 05h02   #5 (permalink)
World champion
 
Avatar de FIKS
 
Date d'inscription: novembre 2002
Localisation: Montreal
Messages: 1 690
Pouvoir de réputation: 9
Reputation: 24 FIKS is on a distinguished road

Moto: CBR600F4i'02 x2, 636'05, gsxr600'02, XR70R, MXR 125 x2
 
Par défaut

I love my job
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Vieux 26/08/2003, 10h49   #6 (permalink)
Stunter
 
Date d'inscription: juillet 2003
Localisation: Magog
Messages: 203
Pouvoir de réputation: 0
Reputation: 10 Blackbirdxx is on a distinguished road

Moto: CBR 1100 XX 2003 superblackbird
 
Par défaut

I LOVE MY JOB TOO
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Vieux 26/08/2003, 18h49   #7 (permalink)
World champion
 
Avatar de Babygirl
 
Date d'inscription: mai 2003
Localisation: St-Zotique
Messages: 967
Pouvoir de réputation: 7
Reputation: 17 Babygirl is on a distinguished road

Moto: Plus rien....pour l'instant!
 
Par défaut

Now that bites!! Funny thaugh

I never had such a bad day....
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